Lazy Soup.

Here are two simple recipes that I invented in 2016. 

These were my favorites when I was so burned out from thinking by the end of the day, that I would just stare blankly at the stove fantasizing about sleep. Too exhausted to even chop vegetables. 

These recipes are great because they are so easy to produce that you'll still have the mental capacity to construct noteworthy answers to the barrage of kid questions like “Why do animals have tails?” and “What's 164 +164?” and “Can I have a Pony for my Birthday?” while you are preparing a warm nutritious meal.
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Andy Warhol Eat Your Heart Out Tomato Soup Stasia Style:

Unlike Campbells, you won't find High Fructose Corn Syrup in my ingredients list..

These beauties come in an 8 pack from Costco for $12.89. That works out to about $1.60/unit. Even though you will find canned tomatoes cheaper, they won't taste nearly as good, and you can trust me on this because I've tried every brand that doesn't have weird stuff added to it.)

One can is enough to feed two children and I.

Make a double recipe if you are feeding another adult.

I empty the can into my blender, then rinse maybe 3/4 cup of water in to swish out those stubborn tomatoes at the bottom. This also gives the soup it's proper viscosity. Once you have the blender lid on tight, press Go! and give them tomatoes a whirl. It shouldn't take more than 30 seconds to reach desired consistency.

Awesome. Now pour into the pot.

I add salt to taste. I only cook with pink salt because it has tons more flavor and hasn't been stripped of all of it's minerals. If you have questions about where hippies get thier iodine from, I recommend Wellness Mama for all of your "omg I'm effing up my own body with my refined processed toxic lifestyle choices" stark realizations.

I toss a half a handful of salt into my mortar & pestle and smash it up in there with some dried green chilies because they have a great flavor and I get bored of black pepper all the time. Black pepper definitely does the job though. (I buy mine at Costco; Malabar is superior.)


I am imagining that you have a really nice banksia pod peppermill or some naturally fallen branch from peppermills.ca. I am lucky enough to have enjoyed the privilege of turning some of these on the lathe back in the day. If you ever get to meet Mr. Lavers I encourage you to ask him all the questions about the trees that fell in the forest as well as his CrushGrind spice busting mechanisms. Season your soup as you prefer.

Now add 1/3 of a bouillon cube. I buy Organic bouillon cubes because hippies Love the word “Organic”, even though we are educated enough to know that substances like Arsenic, Lead, and Mercury are “Organic”.

Stir well, simmer, and that's it. Tomatoes, Water, Salt, Pepper, Bouillon. It's simple and it tastes great.

If you want to get fancy & adventurous a tablespoon of coconut oil and 1/2 tsp of turmeric adds a nice flavor.

Sometimes I sprinkle cilantro and scallions on top.

The nice thing about this recipe is it's a great base for other meals. If you have leftovers, it's easy to turn them into a more exciting soup tomorrow, or a pasta sauce, or even a curry. So many possibilities with a tomato base, really.

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The "Hey Mom, What Does *Cruciferous* Mean?" Broccoli Soup:

 

Alright. Bad Ass Soup # 2, just as simple and easy as the first.

Costco, (yayyyyyy Costco!) Sells bags of frozen “pesticide free” Broccoli. There are 4 packs to a bag, which I think retails for about 10 or 11 bucks, so you're basically looking at each batch of soup costing around $3. Again, 1 bag does me and two kids for a dinner meal.
I totally wish I wasn't buying plastic inside of more plastic, but I have come to accept two important things this year:

1. I don't live in California where they apparently have a WholeFoods on every single street corner so nobody EVER has to feel guilty about plastic packaging and instead are all bestowed the privilege of walking around with contented smiles on thier faces, knowing they are being part of the solution.

2. I forget what number 2 is because my brain is kinda melted from being a Mom...
Oh that's right. I usually remember to buy fresh broccoli and bring it home in a canvas tote but sometimes I forget to return our library books on time and pay important bills and make critical phonecalls and purchase the key ingredient to the amazing meal I wanted to make for dinner that night. So.... Yah. I guess... Instead.... I could make... Ah-ha! Last Minute Decision Fatigue Soup!
Thank Goodness There's an Emergency Stash of Costco Broccoli in the Freezer!!!

Right. So it's identical to the Tomato soup: 1. Open Pack. (blanch those florets if you've naught the time to defrost them) 2. Toss into Blender with Water and 2 cloves of Garlic. Garlic is a really spectacular addition to this soup. - I recommend Sunrise Organics Happy Hippy Garlic That Had Love Songs Sang to it, but hey, use whatever you have on hand. 

You could play Jayden's record album to the flora and fauna in your own garden.
You could sing & dance along to it while you're cooking that dinner.

3. Pour blended creation into the pot, and warm it up with the salt and pepper. Boullion is nice here too.

Possible additions: grated carrot? 1/4 of a sweet onion? handful of blanched almonds?
Mix it up and tumble last night's leftover cauliflower bake into that Osterizer of awesomely delicious cruciferous?! push the boundaries of your own imagination & gustatory palette. 


right about now we rejoice that this is a sing along blog!!!!:

 

Official 2017 Goals List:
Take a Guitar Lesson from Jayden Grahlman and serenade the wild leeks this spring. 😎